Monday, 18 May 2009

Madonna, Shari Arison, Hormones and the Bank

Being hormone-driven is perfectly fine when your name is Madonna. Nobody begrudges Madonna her ever-younger hunks, whether she marries them or not. On the contrary.


It is not so simple in the case of Ms. Shari Arison, Israel’s richest woman and the controlling shareholder of Bank Hapoalim, Israel’s largest bank. Arison inherited some 22 per cent of the bank’s shares. Pension funds and other institutional investors own the rest.


Wilful, moody and often pathetic, Arison seems to be especially attracted to men who cause her public humiliation. Thus, she stood by her now to be divorced third husband, as he was tried and sent to prison for sexual harassment and indecent acts. Now, Arison suffers embarrassment and disgrace as she stands by her bank’s chairman, a man she chose and who Israel’s Central Bank tries to have deposed.


Badly advised, Arison will not listen to the old school, serious, calm and much-respected Governor of Israel’s central bank, Professor Stanley Fischer. Instead Arison doggedly stands by her man and accuses the Bank of Israel of corruption, McCarthyism and a ploy to nationalise her bank.


A word of advice, Ms. Arison (after all, you take on new advisors, gurus, healers, coaches and analysts on a regular basis):


STOP interfering in the bank and transfer your assets to a trust and their management to institutional investors. This will give you all the time and freedom to:


DO all the charity work that you really care about and for which you will be respected. As a BONUS you can have as much fun as you like with young, virile macho men that you crave for. Ask Madonna; perhaps her latest beau has a twin brother.


Nobody will mind and nobody will worry about the quality of your decision-making. Just give up running the bank. It’s not for you.


  1. True but, I assume you will not be looking for a job in Israel soon.

  2. I expect not.

    I will also avoid owing Hapoalim any money. It was a comic sight to watch the Israeli "tycoons" crawling in support of Mr Dankner, lest he calls in their loans.

    They are a pathetic lot.